Posts Tagged ‘Love’

Big sister little brother

I was heart-broken when my first-born died. She was only 3 years old, and she fell off the first floor balcony. I still miss Katherine; Kate as we used to lovingly call her. My husband took it hardest, his dearest little Angel. He still blames me for letting her go and play in the balcony and the climb up the balustrade. I never thought she could climb it. I was pregnant with Mike then. When Mike was born, he looked so much like our Kate, that my husband believed she had come back to us as Mike. Our pain has subsided with time, but it didn’t go away. It can never go away. As people say, your first-born is the most loved.

Mike is 2 years old now. He can talk basic english, but cannot yet form proper sentences. He plays on his own with his toys. He plays with some imaginary friends like all kids do at his age. We bought new toys for him. We removed Kate’s toys after she died and kept them in the attic. It was too heartbreaking to see them around the house.

A week before, Mike sang a nursery rhyme in his broken, stammering english. I was heartsore and my husband, ecstatic. It was Kate’s favorite rhyme. She used to sing it whole day. We didn’t teach Mike that rhyme. Neither did his grandparents. My husband told me in his most assured, victorious tone that Kate had indeed come back as Mike. He was on cloud nine. He encouraged Mike to sing it and taught him a bit more. I didn’t like it. I just felt immense sadness and a deep, dark void inside me.

Yesterday, Mike came up to me while I was cooking in the afternoon, and asked me to get the other toys. I brought the other carton full of his toys. He said he didn’t want them, but the others. I told him he didn’t have more toys. He frowned and asked me to get the toys in the attic. I didn’t tell my husband about this.

Today, I went to take a peek in his room to see what he was doing. He was sitting there, playing with his toy cars. He was probably playing with one of his imaginary friends as usual. I stood there watching him, feeling the love well up inside me, when he suddenly cried out “Kate, dun play wif my caa”.

Kate? Did he just say ‘Kate’ ? Is it our Kate playing with Mike? Is my child still stuck in here? Wasn’t she freed of this world and taken to heaven? What should I do? I would do anything, God but please free her soul and let her rest. Please!

I can’t talk about this to my husband. He wouldn’t believe it. And if he does, it will break his heart further. It is, after all, my fault. I was not watchful towards her on that fateful day. I am the reason for the tragedy, and I know I will have to carry the burden of this truth to my grave.

*************************************The End*************************************

Love

Read part 1 here : https://essdeeauthor.wordpress.com/2013/03/14/first-blush-of-love-part-1/

Darian didn’t understand why the new girl Maria was so interested in him. From what he had heard from the other guys in the school, she had recently moved to the county from New York. She looked pretty but he knew not to trust beauty. His own mother was very beautiful, he being almost an image of her, and she had been unfaithful towards the very people who loved and needed her.

Darian had been a loner for a long time, but he was a happy child before that. His mother had left her family and eloped with a French guy when he was just 7 years old. He was old enough to remember her and hate her for leaving him. His father had not been able to bear with the infidelity and had turned to drinking. Darian grew up being abused and beaten-up by his angry father, developing a deep mistrust towards women and relationships in the process. But he didn’t hate his father for the abuse but rather accepted the punishment as a way of emotional release with the physical pain. He had sworn to himself never to get involved with any girl and go through the same heartache as his father.

Darian had been noticing for some time that Maria would ogle at him many times during the classes, and smile if their eyes met. He thought she was trying to bewitch him. She could too, being as dainty as she was, but he knew better to fall into the designs of a pretty woman. He tried to avoid her in every way possible, and even behaved rudely when she tried to talk to him. He thought the insult would do the trick and she would start to dislike him, but that didn’t happen.

After a couple of days of their first encounter, Darian got to know from other guys that Maria was asking questions about him. This angered him. Didn’t the girl know better to mind her own business? What did she want from him? He decided he had to talk to her and make it clear that he wanted this nonsense stopped. He walked up to her one day after school when she was walking back home, and asked her to stop snooping around and let him be.  Her smiling face fell, and she turned red. She looked very embarrassed and mumbled an incoherent ‘sorry for the trouble, won’t happen again’ and ran away.

After that incident, Darian kept checking for a few weeks if Maria looked at him during the lectures, but she didn’t. Not a single time did she lift her lashes to even peep at him. Maria had turned quiet and blue after that day, not her usual smiling self. Darian had felt happy in the beginning at his accomplishment, but that feeling was fading away fast and regret was taking over. He didn’t quite understand this new emotion and attributed it to the fact that he had made an unfortunate girl even more sad, getting to know of late that her parents had died a few moths before. He started empathizing with her for having lost her parents and repented his outburst at her. He decided to make amends and walked up to her again one day after school and called after her. She turned back and looked shyly at him. She looked frightened and at the same time, so beautiful that he forgot what he had come to say. She waited but words completely eluded him. Finally when he got his grip, he babbled his apologies for his earlier behavior and that he didn’t mean to hurt her but only to protect his privacy and so on. Maria offered a quiet ‘okay’ in reply when he finished and walked away. Things had changed.

When Darian saw Maria at the school next day, he smiled at her, but she hardly noticed, never actually even looking at him. He realized it was due to his stupidity that the tables had turned. Days were moving by and Darian couldn’t stop thinking about her. He yearned to talk to her. He knew this feeling was only going to bring heartache and disaster for him, but he couldn’t stop himself. He tried to concentrate in studies and worked harder at the farm but that didn’t help much.  He didn’t know what to tell her to make her talk to him again.  Should he say he just wanted to be friends? Or should he tell her he liked her? He himself wasn’t clear on what he wanted out of the whole thing, but he knew he had to do something before she drove him crazy.

*******************************To be continued**************************************

love4

Maria Albert was just 16 years old. She couldn’t be expected to take care of her family! Not like this, suddenly, without any training or experience!  And how much help were grandparents going to be? They were old, and she would have to end up taking care of them too. This wasn’t fair at all. But she didn’t have a choice, did she? She took stock of her situation, understanding that life wasn’t fair and cribbing about her bad fortune would not change anything.

Maria’s parents had passed away a month ago in a car crash leaving her and her two kid brothers orphaned. Her younger brothers, Ted and Frank, were aged 10 and 4 respectively. Ted had been sulking since the accident, not talking to anyone, as if the death of his parents had squeezed the spirit out of him. Frank was very young to understand what had happened. He thought his parents had gone for a vacation, leaving them in their grandparents’ house. He was busy chasing squirrels, and running after butterflies in their grandparents’ garden. Maria was devastated too. Every now and then she would burst into tears remembering them. But youth allows you to bounce back like never again. After the incident, her grandfather asked them to leave school in New York and come and stay with them in the small town of West Orange, Texas.

Maria enrolled herself in the West Orange-Stark High School in the sophomore year. This was the first time she was changing school and didn’t know what to expect on her first day, having grown up with the same friends in the same school in New York. Will the other kids look down upon her? Well, they can’t, can they? She was from New York after all, a big city compared to a small place like this. Or maybe, being jealous, they would make fun of her for the exact same reason!

She arrived at the school, with a satchel containing just a notebook. She stood in front of the gate with a look of uncertainty on her face. She looked beautiful in a quiet sort of way, with big blue terrified eyes, rosy, tender lips, a shock of red hair, and almost pink complexion. She would not be considered a very forthright person, but rather as timid and shy. She would rather voice her concerns in private than before a group of people. She knew she did not stand a chance if the kids at the school behaved nastily towards her. With misgivings, she entered the school.

She went to the principal’s office. He welcomed her, expressing regret over the demise of her parents, and hoping that she would like this school. He handed her a school curriculum which she checked for her first class. It was history. She headed towards the class, but unable to find it, hovered in the area. A girl, tall and smart-looking with thick glasses, enquired as to what Maria was looking for. Hearing Maria’s reply, she introduced herself as Rita Thomas, adding that she had history as her first class too. Maria introduced herself, giving a little background as to the reason of joining this school and they both went into the class together.

Inside the class, Rita introduced Maria to the other students. The teacher had not arrived yet, so some of the students flocked around her. They introduced themselves and asked her about New York and how she liked it here. When the teacher walked into the class, everyone raced back to their seats. The teacher also asked for her introduction, which she gave, again. She could not remember the last time when she had to speak so much. Maria had already begun to like this school. It was not bad at all. It was, in fact, very good. The kids seemed nice and sensible and down-to-earth, not at all like the snotty kids in New York. And they were very nice to her. Maybe, coming to live in West Orange county was going to be very good for her.

There was one guy in the class, Darian Hudson, who did not speak to her. At all. He was a very good-looking guy, tall and athletic, with nice cropped hair and a handsome face. Maria wasn’t the type to talk to anyone first, but she made a daring exception for him. She said a soft ‘hi’, to which he nodded curtly and left. This surprised her, as she knew she looked okay, and she did have a few admirers in New York. Why would he ignore her then? She was intrigued, and because he was a combination of both good looks and mystery, she felt attracted towards him. She hadn’t seen him talking to any of the girls. Was he shy of girls? Or did he have a secret past? She couldn’t rein in her imagination, thinking Darian might be a vampire like Edward Cullen of Twilight series. How cool would that be? She decided she would find out more about him before curiosity drove her mad.

************************************To be continued********************************